Thursday, July 23, 2009

...that's Master Jessica to you now.

I cannot believe the month of July has almost come and gone and I have yet to write anything, well, a fair amount of anything. I am sure you are ALL dying to know what the 4-1-1 is and I will no longer keep you waiting...

1) (Get over it, I love lists.) I am finally done with my MBA cue the Pomp and Circumstance music!Therefore when referring to me, it's no longer just Jessica (WHORESSICA, ICA, MULLEN, etc.), it's MASTER Jessica. Show me some damn respect. Really, people. Actually, to be quite honest, not having scholastic endeavors to pursue has left me kind of, well, lost. I've been in school since I was knee high to a grasshopper (excuse my Southern expression-isms) and it's odd that when something is so much a part of you that you feel kind of naked when it is cut out of your life. It could be THAT or maybe it is that I am scared of taking the BIG step into career-hood. I have my commitment issues and they apply to almost everything, but school? Who am I without some fancy, schmancy degree to get under my belt? Anyway, bottom line, it's MASTER JESSICA or I will beat you.

2)My grandma passed away on July 5, 2009. My grandma and I had a rocky relationship (as I have with almost all of my family, it's hard being the BLACK SHEEP in the family). Either way, while I was in high school and in Colorado, my grandma cooked for me, did my laundry and we had some fun memorable times. She was an amazing cook and played a mean game of pinochle. She chain-smoked, had a great pair of legs, and full head of curly, wild hair (which she passed on to my Dad and Sister). I will remember her when I was little. My sister and I would go stay with her and she'd make the most delicious foods and she had a garden in her backyard. During Christmas time she had "A Christmas Story" playing nonstop on TV, except for when the Macy's parade was on... she loved to be on the water. In October, I plan on joining my family in Florida to spread her ashes along the Atlantic, where we spread (my Step-Grandfather) Dick's ashes. Rest in Peace, Grandma. I love you. I am relieved to know you are out of pain and in our Father's loving arms. <3

3)I have decided that once August rolls around, I am going to take my "list" (which has been saved in my phone for sometime) and start writing out my stories for my book. I've been told time-in and time-out that I should do stand up. I can't speak in public (and I have to take Xanax if I have to) and so, I will get to show off my literary skills instead. Hopefully, this will launch me on a book tour and I'll get to see the world for FREE and get paid to do it. Time to start looking for CROSS COUNTRY BOOTY CALLS. Kidding, slightly... I am not sure, but this seems the right thing to do. I love people and all the weirdness that we encompass, the right thing for me to do would be for me to make people happy and my sense of humor and ridiculousness might just be what humanity needs. I am going to save the world with laughter. I wonder how raunchy I will be once I am translated into French? I am getting a head of myself, again. Wait until you read this ridiculousness. It's stories about my life and thoughts/rants that I get/go on...it's going to GRR-EAT, like frosted flakes, except my flavor won't get soggy or go stale.

4) I have been self reflective lately. I have been praying a lot. Spending a lot of time with my sister. Reading. Keeping to myself. I have been low key. It's a combination of things. I am relieved school is over, but lost about it. I am being a crutch for my sister and taking advantage of spending every opportunity I can with her. I am slightly heart-broken against better judgment and I just feel the need to refocus my energy. Figure out my next move. 2009 is a year in which I am going after what I want, I am exploring selfishness, and trying to better myself. For those of you I have been flaky with, I am sorry, I am just about me right now. It's a good thing... there is only so much of my own ridiculousness that I can handle.

5) EAT PRAY LOVE. I read this book once all the way through and am re-reading it after finishing it. Any woman in her late 20s should read this book. It is beyond amazing. There is such a wealth of understanding and enlightenment in this book that I couldn't absorb it all the first go around, I go in line and went for seconds, savoring it and reading it more carefully. This book is so well written that you don't just read it, you experience it. I feel as if this woman, Elizabeth Gilbert, knows me. She's kind of a neurotic, worry-wart, which makes her 100% relate-able to me. She is truly skilled with the pen, gifted, I add, too.

6) I also want to start volunteering in August as well. Now that school has wrapped up, I think donating my time to non-profits such as: Big Brothers, Big Sisters or the Boys and Girls Club. Something with youth. I know most people get nervous when they think about me being around impressionable youth, but the truth of the matter is, I love OTHER PEOPLE'S KIDS, I just don't have any desire or need to have children of my own. For some reason kids love me, I think it is my love of all things Disney, especially Hannah Montana (TEAM MILEY)! I really feel I could have a positive impact on a kid and that they would benefit me greatly as well.

This is the gist of it. I want to wrap this up and not bore you all to tears. I have a lot of good things going on and am truly grateful to be alive. I have amazing friends and family. I am blessed and I am loved. Later bitches, I got some RE-COCK-YOU-LESS-NESS to get to. Or, you know, research for my new book.

PEACE, LOVE, and TOMATO BASIL SOUP, y'all,
MASTER Jessica.

3 comments:

nosugrstilswt08 said...

Hey MASTER Jessica, did they teach you how to COUNT in ANY school you were attending? There seems to be TWO 5's in your list... I am pretty sure that "6" comes after "5"...

Just sayin.

I love you.

JESS!CA said...

Thanks, Karissa. You are always so supportive. Thank you a million times over!

I am sad about my grammy, too. I cannot believe that I left out that she hated raisins. I do, too. I can't even enjoy 95% of trail mixes because of my reason detestation!

JESS!CA said...

Dear Maggie,

You are on CRACK. I don't see any typos. Good looking out. I fixed it, so uh, now I don't know what you are talking about.

Love,
Master Jessica

PS: You are just jealous I FIST better.