Thursday, January 10, 2008

2007... it's a wrap!

Let me tell you about my year. Well, this is me we're talking about so nothing was too dull.

I have been independent for an entire year. (WOW!) I mean, I am completely 100% supporting myself. I am a functional, well-adjusted adult; who would have thought?!

I finally found the *NSYNC Christmas album, to some who never knew me in the height of my *NSYNC crazed days you were spared. There is a part of me that will always be that teeny-booper.

My sister and I have grown so close this year. She's not just my sister, she's my friend too. Hence the term: SISTER FRIEND.

So, I bought a car this year, let me tell you. I hate the beast. If someone would do me a favor and I dunno, total it, kill it, make it go away, I'd love you FOREVER. Really, I miss the GREEN MACHINE. It died this year, someone who I thought was a friend totaled it and still owes me money for it, god forbid I hunt him down.

I've lost a few friends this year. I've pushed some people away, but I have become very strong in my beliefs and who I am. If you don't fit into that scheme of me and my life, you gotta go. I have and am working so hard and so much to become this great person, this self-actualized person that I am so extremely proud of. Nothing and no one will stand in the way of me and my dreams. Nor will I give anyone the power to comprimise them. I work too hard and stress myself to the brink to throw it all away.

This year I've learned a lot about myself. I am a pushover. I let people walk all over me. I let them lie to me and I don't even call them on their bull shit. I don't understand why I am so in need of people's acceptance, especially people I do not know nor should I care about, but I do. I need to learn to stand up and be strong, even if that means I am a total bitch. I am becoming more fierce, so watch out.

The relationships I have with people that I truly care about are better than ever. As I am learning more about myself I am able to share that person with those around me. I've met some amazing people this year and I have made stronger ties with friends that have been around for awhile. I am pretty lucky.

I got A LOT of amazing reading done this year and have been taken on fabulous literary journeys that have led me to laugh, cry, smile, be disgusted, and have made me think deeper about life, existence, and yhe meaning of everything. If you'd like to know these books just ask…I also pass them along after I am done reading them so they can inspire and be enjoyed by others. If you want them let me know, I will gladly hand them over.

This has been a great year of music. The last three months I have been getting into country, so much so that 104.3 FM is set as number 2 on my stereo. I think the older I get the more my taste for different genres are expanding. I'm a little bit county, a little bit rock n' roll, and a whole lot of POP! It just make me that much more ecclectic.

I have also matured. I am amazed at how responsible I am. How I am managing my time better. How I am juggling two jobs, full time grad school, and a social life. I am a gangsta, no doubt, but I am very proud of my recent level of focus. I am a BIG KID after all. Really, sometimes I feel like a pod person or an imposter. I still crave and long to be a 12 year old, but I enjoy my independence and freedom.

I have been pretty healthy this year and kicked the nicotine habit. I still slip occasionally when I am a raging, drunken, hot mess. The impact of not smoking makes me feel so much better. I can breathe and get this I have no where as many boogers as I used to have. Things also taste better and people tell me I smell good, which is SWEET and a huge self-esteem boost.

Some of you know that I got married this year; it's not traditional nor is it conventional. It is a true story though and you can look it up on the clark county recorders site if you'd like. This is a long, complicated mess of a story… but let me tell you, in true Jessica fashion it is FREAKING fabulous.

I also started Grad School this year, which is challenging and makes me crazy. I have never been so stressed out, yet I am the happiest and most content I have ever been. I've let go of a lot of partying. Trust me, I miss drinking and dancing til the break of down and I am still fortunate enough to indulge occasionally, but my priorities are where they need to be. I am going to be a MBA. Casica Andermul, Donald Trump better watch out.

Beans and Deanzo, my baby furry friends as GREAT. I love them. They are still furry and cuddly and are doing VERY well. As well as the short hair pretty kitty, Zucchini Walnut Muffin (named after my favorite Starbucks muffin). Seriously, I am a cat lady and I wouldn't change it for the world. Except maybe the fact their fur is IMPOSSIBLE to manage. Anyone who has tricks of the trade, holler at your girl.

So all in all, let me wrap this up and say this year: I got married, got my car totaled, became a grad student, got a decent job with a routine schedule, I've gotten rid of toxic people, made new friends, and have grown a little older, a little wiser, and little stronger. On a side note it TOTALLY freaks me out to be closer to 30 than 20. I still love Britney Spears too damn much. I don't know why but I refuse to put in my two weeks notice at the 'bucks, I still am goofy and crass and vulgar and I don't think that will ever change. I walk a fine, fine like between sanity and insanity, maturity and immaturity…it's just how I roll.

I am SO incredibly excited for 2008. I know it is going to be another topsy, turvy year full of laughs, tears, hopes, dreams, disappointments, failures, and various other possibilities. I am ready to take it on and conquer it...