Fabulous!

I am a fabulous, fabulous bitch.

I've put a lot of thought in to this and I am pretty sure if I tried hard enough I could indeed shit glitter.

Here is a list of why I am fabulous:

1. I am a gay man (a queen if you will).
2. I have a clutter of cats with random names.
3. I am tall enough that I don't have to wear heels, but can rock them if I need to.
4. I know all the words to every damn *NSYNC song!
5. I have maxed out a credit card buying Britney Spears tickets.
6. I say OMG and LOL in common everyday talk.
7. People know I am a whore and accept me for it, in fact I have an entire Whore Posse.
8. I also know that the bird is the word.
9. I have a BA in Psychology and a minor in Theatre.
10. I can karaoke Britney Spears and/or Madonna better than anyone.
11. I went to college with Your Mom.
12. My little sister goes by Barbie.
13. I have read the entire Harry Potter series twice.
14. I speak my mind.
15. I tend to buy cocktails that match or accentuate my outfit.
16. I make COCK cakes and have a dick of the month club.
17. I don't believe in exercise, but believe highly in SEX-ercise.
18. I resemble Monica Lewinsky.
19. I didn't vote for Bush, TWICE.
20. This year, I Baracked the vote.
21. I have kissed lots of girls.
22. I have kissed even more boys!
23. I was once voted 'Biggest NOT Nice Person.'
24. I won the fifth grade spelling bee at my elementary school.
25. I am only 6-degrees away from Kevin Bacon.
26. My dad is a Postal Worker.
27. I am 6 months away from my M.B.A.
28. I named my 'girls' Thelma and Louise.
29. I know what happened at Band Camp.
30. I am a Starbucks Barista.
31. My home is the Pussy Palace.
32. I put a boot up Best Buy's ass.
33. There is a Hello Kitty toaster in my kitchen.
34. I have a written list of all my lovers.
35. My favorite band is tattooed on me and I share this tattoo with my oldest hussy.
36. I can do my make up with a little compact mirror while in a car.
37. The fact I don't have to wear make up at all, I am hot.
38. I have a tiara and wear it whenever I want!

I could go on and on, but my ego is a force to be reckoned with. I will bid you all ado and recommend that you concur with my list or I will cut you. And when I say cut you I mean, have one of my many bitches with ninja skills do the dirty work. Divas don't touch it. (Remember I have a posse.)

Tootles!