Today is Thanksgiving, a wholesome, American holiday. In true American fashion, it is celebrated by gluttony (one of my favorite sins) and has a dirty, shady past (fucking over the Native Americans is rarely discussed).
As some of you may know, I am in the holiday spirit. I love cheesy, campy things and let me tell you, I am all ready annoying Kristi "Big Boobs" with my youtubing of *NSync Christmas tunes (as well as every other pop artists seasonal hits). We all know I am essentially a gay man; I am a walking pride parade most days. WORK. IT. OUT.
Driving over to WHORE POSSE HQ on my way to celebrate T-GIVE 2K8, I passed a Sonic and a Jack in the Box and was astonished that there were lines (LINES) in their respective drive-throughs. I thought of how sad that most be, to be alone on a holiday. Sure some of these folks are probably cat ladies (my future more than likely), but what about the other people. It then dawned on me that perhaps their loved one(s) are out of town or unable to get off work or worse yet, fighting in a war. I then realized how truly fortunate I am for all of the wonderful people and things in my life. I am a quite lucky and often times I lose sight of all the things I take for granted. With no further ado, let me present:
"What Jessica Is Grateful for 2K8."
Friends and Family.
Cable TV.
Baby Deanzo.
My two jobs.
Apples to Apples.
Sephoria
Indoor Plumbing.
Fierce A-line Haircut.
Great Skin.
A Killer Rack.
Food in my belly.
A Roof over My Head.
Microwaves.
Xtube/ Youporn
Polka Dots.
Handicapped Parking.
My new car.
Moist Toilettes.
The Whore Posse.
Digital Cameras.
Makin' love to thugs, in the club with my sites on.
Segue and Sidebar.
Pedicures.
Being unpregnant.
Scented candles.
Barack Obama.
Dino's
My wit.
Target.
Febreeze.
Old friends becoming current friends.
Q-Tips.
Fresh and Easy
The word "FUCK;" it's perfect.
Britney Spears' comeback.
Burts Bees.
Cocoa Pebbles.
Books, preferably hard copies.
Education.
The Rain and Fog.
The Brave Little Toaster.
Cheesecake and Martinis.
Kicking the Habit.
My Black Belt in Karate.
Singing "Like a Virgin" with a balloon penis.
The color black, which slims my fat ass.
Love
Beauty.
My life.
This list could go on and on and on, but I kept it short and a little bit funny. Also, don't ask me where I come up with shit. I don't know. It's organic, it oozes from me, yes, oozes. You know you love my sick, twisted mind.
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